Run BTS Rewatch Episode 46: Throwing Things

방탄공방, Bangtan Workshop

In this phase of BTS’s career, they were busy, stressed, and racing their way from packed schedule to packed schedule. Is it any wonder the production team was trying to give them a break from their lives by letting them learn a new skill from a master, often using their hands? It’s not as good as hanging out with dogs for a day, but as stress relief it’s not a bad idea.

And okay, throwing pots can lead to a lot of penis jokes, but I’m going to try to keep it as clean as they will allow me.

Setup:

Today’s BTS annex course is throwing pots, using a wheel and everything! I’ve never done this and it looks very hard but as these guys have never met a skill they couldn’t master within a couple of hours I have a lot of faith in them! They will each make something to give to a randomly assigned other member, but there is no competition, just the joy of gifting someone an item that they absolutely can’t get rid of even if they want to because you made it with your own two hands.

The Moments of Pure Love:

1. For this pottery adventure they are all wearing clothes that make them look like upscale stall owners at a seasonal farmer’s market

2. Their intros are always a little awkward but this one is off the charts awkward as they try to be confused about where they are and what they’re doing, when it’s obviously a pottery shop

3. Jungkook, forced to stand in the middle of this, clasps his hands in front of his body, shuffles behind Namjoon, and stares at the floor

4. Namjoon, somewhat desperately, begins recounting every single hobby he had as a cultured child (piano, Taekwondo, pottery), with the somewhat anticlimactic reveal that he doesn’t remember anything about it

5. He then saves it with a very sus recollection that the pottery workshop had a live ostrich outside of it; no one believes him but it breaks the ice, which is why he’s the leader

6. Jimin gets to ask what they’re doing this time

7. They randomly pick a member out of a bucket of papers, which creates some extra humor in this episode as people know who is working on their gift and can be happy or sad respectively

8. Yoongi is very relieved that they only had to pick once, because apparently in these things they almost always have someone pick themselves and have to go again, which is a fun behind the scenes tidbit

9. Jungkook, speaking over everyone else in his eagerness for this joke, says that his ceramic won’t last very long because he’s giving it to Namjoon

   1. Hoseok, helpfully explaining the joke, asks if it’s because Namjoon will destroy it immediately?

   2. Namjoon promises to put it on a shelf immediately so it will remain intact

10. Taehyung, also ready to be a cheeky maknae, says that his ceramic won’t be used well because he’s giving it to Yoongi

    1. Yoongi stares at camera, Office-style, and licks the inside of his lips

11. Jin says that his ceramic will simply be left behind because he’s giving it to Jungkook

    1. Jungkook laughs delightedly

    2. Jungkook is lightly roasted from all sides about how he totally does this, including a gift that Jin got him on an overseas trip that he left in the hotel

12. Jimin says that he’s not even sure he’ll get a ceramic, because Yoongi is giving it to him

    1. Yoongi nods in acceptance, but you can tell Vmin are in for it when they get home

13. To round out the gifters, Namjoon is giving to Hoseok, Hoseok is giving to Jin, and Jimin is giving to Taehyung

14. Hoseok, #1 process follower, says that they cannot simply make pottery without being given detailed instructions, which introduces the teacher

15. The teacher introduces himself as a maker of pottery for 23 years, which blows everyone’s fucking minds

    1. Jimin points out that Jungkook is only 22, and the teacher doesn’t really know what to say to that

    2. This, along with the popularization of coffee, marks yet one more thing that happened before Jungkook was born

16. They all sit down, and the teacher pulls out a wrapped dirt log which makes Hoseok shout in astonishment

17. He plops a piece of it on the wheel, and all of them burst into sustained applause; the teacher doesn’t really know how to react to that

18. All of them, except for Taehyung who is busy covering his mouth in awe, mime how they will also throw their dirt onto the wheel in the exact same cool way

    1. I cannot overstate how much the guy just put some dirt on a pottery wheel

19. The teacher, in what will ultimately prove to be a mistake, announces that they’re going to use white clay, and he also explains they can’t take it home because it has to go in the kiln and bake

20. Jin, worried, asks what happens if it breaks in the baking

21. The teacher, dumbfounded, is like, then it’s broken?

22. Namgi predict there will be a lot of broken pottery from this crew

23. The teacher, sensing danger, strongly warns them never to work the clay over itself because then air gets in and it explodes like a bomb and ruins everything in the kiln; he demonstrates this with a small piece of clay then sets it aside

24. Jungkook scoops up the discarded clay so he can play with it in his hands by rolling it into the ball, announcing out loud that this is what’s he’s going to do

25. The teacher asks them to touch the clay, which the nearby people do; Jimin, who is farther away, puts his arm all the way around Jin’s broad shoulder to lean over him to do so

26. The teacher begins slapping the clay rhythmically to soften it; Jihope are overcome with the beat and stand up to dance

27. The teacher invites them to touch again, and everyone except Taegi stand up to poke at it

28. Yoongi touches it spiritually from across the room; Taehyung touches it with his eyes only

29. The members touching it with their hands begin slapping the hell out of it yelling “bad clay! bad!!” and you can’t take these guys anywhere

30. The teacher gets the wheel going and shapes the clay into a tower and once again they are all overwhelmed

31. Jimin declares that if he can just make it do that he will consider it a success

32. Jin tells Hoseok that because he drinks a lot of water in his room (implied that it’s during his hours-long gaming sessions), he would like a huge water cup, something so large he has to use two hands to drink out of it like a hobbit

33. They finally get started, and they bring out an extra guy to help them because one man cannot possibly handle seven Bangtans all at once

34. Jin jump scares himself by throwing down his clay

35. Jungkook spins his wheel so fast that it sends him into a giggling fit

36. Namjoon is into the therapeutic smacking of clay

37. Hoseok one-ups him by yelling “Jimin, please clean!!!!” as he hits his clay over and over again

38. Hoseok then asks the teacher how he did with the slapping and the teacher is like “you did a great job”, and Hoseok calls himself the ace of pottery

39. Hoseok, flush with success, stands up, walks over to Namjoon, puts his arms around him at the wheel, and begins singing Unchained Melody, Ghost-style

    1. Namjoon sits rigidly terrified as he is suddenly very aware of his whole body

    2. Hoseok realizes that we can all see him and goes back to his place, announcing it feels a little weird

40. His place is next to Yoongi, who has gotten his clay slightly off-center, making it wobble and oscillate as he spins the wheel; Yoongi is befuddled

41. Jungkook has simply begun making beautiful ceramics, silently

42. Jimin holds his hands in the warm water like he’s getting ready for a manicure

43. Rapline continues to struggle with their wobbly clay, until Yoongi produces something that looks kind of like the tip of a crayon

44. Jimin presses so hard as it spins that he halves his clay and stops, flabbergasted

45. Namjoon presses so hard he simply lifts his entire piece of clay off of the wheel

46. Jin has made a tall, thin tower that he doesn’t know how to stop making and the teacher has to come over and help

    1. Jin presses down on the top of it, turning it into something of an elephant’s trunk

    2. Jin begins crying with hysterical laughter

47. Taehyung has not said a word the entire time as he has decided his new profession is master potter and he’s doing great making a vase

48. Yoongi has made a loop of clay like a giant donut

49. Namjoon calls his lump of clay his friend, but it won’t obey him at all

50. Yoongi starts getting really into the physics of the wheel and how they can measure how fast it’s spinning

51. Hoseok makes a heart, shows it to us lecherously, then gives it to Namjoon; Namjoon appreciates it

52. Taehyung has now monopolized the second assistant in his quest to make the most beautiful creation anyone has ever seen

53. Jimin messes up his pot and claims that he gets greedy when it starts going well

54. Jimin slams his messed up clay onto a pile of other messed up clay and tries to convince Taehyung that his gift will be a surrealist pile of unfired clay

    1. Taehyung doesn’t pay attention even a little bit

55. Yoongi wrestles with his clay and loses miserably

56. Namjoon has made something amazing and 2seok begin praising him at top volume

    1. Hoseok asks who the lucky dog is who’s going to get Namjoon’s piece, and is delighted when it’s him

57. Jungkook, somewhat piqued at not being the best, asks the teacher for help in pushing out the center of his

58. Jimin announces that Taehyung looks like he knows what he’s doing 100% but he’s actually not even close

    1. Yoongi is like, what are you gonna do that’s Taehyung

59. Taehyung and Namjoon both finish their piece, and Hoseok compliments Namjoon so fervently that Namjoon can’t even look at him

60. Jungkook, again needled by this, announces that he has learned to control his own strength and has the Pottery Feeling

61. Yoongi continues to struggle with every piece of clay he tries, dumping it all into a pile in front of him when it fails

62. Yoongi asks the teacher how much dirt people usually use in his class and the teacher is like “you have used so much dirt you don’t even know”

63. The editors show a montage of all of the times people asked for more dirt, which is lengthy, and we can also see here that they’ve switched them from the good white dirt to the less expensive brown dirt because this pottery shop only has so much to give

64. Jin decapitates his piece and tries to convince Jungkook it’s a lightbulb statue

    1. Jungkook doesn’t pay attention to him even a little bit

65. The teacher praises Jungkook for his work, and Jungkook asks if he can make the hole deeper, and the teacher - taken aback - asks what Jungkook wants to make, and Jungkook says he doesn’t know, he just wants to go deeper

66. Yoongi supports this in the philosophical sense of always going a little more than what you thought you wanted to when searching for your dreams

67. Yoongi also realizes that he is better at composing music than making pottery

68. Hoseok asks if what he’s made is what Jin wanted, and Jin is like “wtf is that” which gives Hoseok the Big Sad

69. Jimin uses string to try to pattern his piece but he decapitates it

70. Yoongi asks the room if this is the first thing they’ll fail at, and Jin is like “but Namjoon did great? so it might just be you?'“

71. Jinmin begin playing with the wheel itself as they despair at pottery

72. Jin praises Jungkook, then Hoseok, and he is full of magnanimity today

73. Taehyung is very excited about his own pottery and doesn’t care if anyone else praises him tbh

74. Namjoon begins talking to himself in affirmations, telling himself he can do it

75. Hoseok, his internal clock pinging, asks how much time they have left, which is 10 minutes

76. Yoongi has made a statue that looks like a penis trophy and he’s proud of it

77. Yoongi also smacks the clay so hard that he gets Hoseok’s nice black pants dirty; Hoseok is displeased

78. Taehyung gets into trouble and yells that someone needs to help him, because his art is dying

    1. Jimin, next to him, says he needs to cut it off then, because when it’s dead it’s dead, and that’s how you move on

    2. Taehyung refuses to accept this!

    3. This explains a lot about Vmin in a single exchange

79. Jimin declares he will win over the clay using his power, but the clay doesn’t listen and he collapses into giggle

80. Namjoon also reveals that his black pants are now clay-washed, and Yoongi’s jeans have become the same

81. Yoongi threatens to take his pants off because they now look so cool and vintage that he wants to preserve them, and Namjoon can’t help but laugh

82. Taehyung is now going for quantity, as he’s made four pieces and starts in on a fifth

83. Namjoon juggles small clay balls and accidentally throws one on Jungkook’s back; Jungkook gives him a silent look of disbelief, and Namjoon is ashamed

84. Jin makes a lovely bowl with the help of the assistant, except when the assistant takes his hand away Jin immediately warps it; Jin laughs at himself heartily

85. Hoseok has finished a cup and bowl and screams happily

86. Jin has made a loop of pasta and is very proud of himself

87. Jungkook has made a pot with a cool top shape like a honey pot and they’re all impressed

88. The teacher announces they will begin decorating, and Namjoon, Yoongi, and Jin all firmly believe that they can only do damage to their pieces by decorating them

89. Jimin has given up on the wheel and handmade a clay rose that he is very proud of, then announces he’s keeping it for himself and giving Taehyung something else that everyone says is kind of weird looking

90. Taehyung has made six pieces, and he is soooooooo proud of himself

91. Yoongi is very worried that he’s getting six pieces of pottery he doesn’t need

92. Yoongi decides to simply write “Jimin <3” on his cup, and wishes aloud that Jimin will drink water out of it; he’s smirking because he knows this is the bare minimum but the emotional plea will let him get away with it

93. Namjoon has made his cup a friendship cup for Hoseok, and he is also very proud

94. Taehyung is skeptical that Jimin’s weird pottery thing will be useful; Jimin sings DNA at him

95. Jimin asks how long it will take for them to get it and pessimist Yoongi is like “they’ll probably all explode”

96. They try to finish up, and Jimin drops a huge glob of paint on his pottery piece then says there’s a great feeling to it

    1. Taehyung says there is not a great feeling, there is a huge glob of paint

97. Hoseok says that they're all done and should stop; he keeps working

98. Taehyung stands up and begins a teacher roleplay, telling them to put their brushes down

    1. Yoongi joins in and says “Stoooop. Stoooooop. Jimin put down your brush. Let go of your brush,” from the other side of the room

    2. No one listens, but Jimin extra doesn’t listen

    3. Yoongi sighs and gets even louder, and Jimin says he’s finished as he continues to work

    4. Yoonmin continue to bicker, and Yoongi says that Jimin must have not ever listened to his teachers

    5. Jimin says actually he was class leader for 9 years because he is the best boy that’s ever lived

    6. Everyone is VERY impressed with this, especially Namjoon

    7. The best part about this is that Jungkook, Namjoon, and Hoseok are also still working but no one says anything to him

    8. Yoongi finally catches on to this and pleads with them all to stop; it’s so cute that Jimin actually does

99. They begin explaining their pieces from right to left in a little ceremony

100. Yoongi explains that his slightly malformed piece represents a word he totally makes up and the translators can’t even translate it; he has scrawled an illegible signature on one side and Jimin’s name with a heart on the other side

     1. Jungkook scoffs in disbelief at this shameless hyung

     2. Jin actually says “You really are the worst” after watching Yoongi try to sell this

     3. Yoongi knows he hasn’t brought his A-game but he also can’t do this pottery thing so he has accepted his fate

101. Hoseok straightens his pieces with minute adjustments as he explains that he went for a classic huge mug and snack bowl for Jin, then spins it around on his wheel carefully for a good shot

     1. Jin is loudly satisfied with these offerings

     2. Jimin and Taehyung are paying absolutely no attention to this, as Jimin is still painting and Taehyung is carefully arranging all of his pottery on his wheel for display

102. Namjoon explains that his concept is “west and east” where Namjoon and Hoseok represent these two poles because this guy never really takes a day off; J-hope is painted in red and green because Hoseok’s favorite color is green and red symbolizes hope, and Namjoon is decorated in navy and brown because Namjoon likes those colors

     1. Everyone is impressed with Namjoon’s serious efforts

     2. Hoseok announces to Yoongi that he’s going to eat cereal out of his Namjoon and Hoseok bowl

     3. Namjoon is incredibly embarrassed by his own self and stares at the floor

103. Jungkook has made Namjoon a teapot and a cup, minus the teapot lid because he ran out of time; he thinks Namjoon can put green tea in it

     1. Namjoon is super into the shape of the teapot and shakes Jungkook’s hand

104. Jin gives his explanation like a pitch for a commercial that he is starring in, where he ordered japchae and it arrived but he doesn’t want to put it in a plastic bowl and that’s where this little number comes in; he was also inspired by an American TV show where sailors tipped rum into their mouths from a huge bowl

     1. Namjoon is super into these sailors, and they start a discussion when -

105. Taehyung, who had finished rearranging his pieces, suddenly spins his wheel and all of them fly off onto the ground, interrupting the proceedings

     1. Everyone swivels to him like they’re on a sitcom

     2. Namjoon laughs his most hysterical laugh

     3. Jimin, who has his legs crossed primly, looks down at the smushed pottery with an expression that conveys the entire season arc of a character on Real Housewives

     4. Jin laughs so hard he can’t even make sounds anymore

     5. Yoongi covers his whole face with a huge hand to stop himself from crying

     6. Hoseok waits until he’s set the misshapen pieces up on the wheel again, then stands up and claps as he laughs

106. Jimin is proud of a neat and clean white clay piece that survived so he left it undecorated; he also colored his rose red and it’s his personal favorite that he’s going to keep

     1. Namjoon compares the cup to something Dionysus would drink out of, and we all collectively gasp here in the future

     2. Yoongi thinks the rose is going to explode but Jimin said the teacher approved it for baking, but as he explains it he looks at the teachers’ face and realizes the teacher might have been lying because Jimin is very hard to deny

107. Taehyung is up next, but before he can start Namjoon, Yoongi, and Jin go on a long bit about how dropping them was just a part of the big picture of his entire theme and delivery, and he’s a genius

108. Taehyung finally picks up his teapot, where the spout has been smashed almost closed

     1. When Yoongi asks how he’s supposed to get water into it, Taehyung admits he can’t find the hole for that yet but he’ll keep looking

     2. Namjoon posits that pouring water out of it will take forever

     3. Jin laughs hysterically in the background the whole time

     4. Jungkook throws his head back and does his uncontrolled laugh that’s pure delight

109. Taehyung goes to his next piece, which looks kind of like an old fashioned milk jug complete with handle, and he says that it follows a dream he had about a movable gear

     1. Yoongi realizes that the handle won’t move once it’s baked, because it’s porcelain

     2. Taehyung demonstrates how you pour it with the whole container

     3. Hoseok thinks that this is a great way to burn yourself

     4. Namjoon takes pity on the man and notes that it’s very artistic

     5. Yoongi says, very slowly, that art is hard

     6. Jin’s chuckles are slowing, becoming less frequent, but are never fully gone, and redouble every time Taehyung reveals a new mangled pottery object

110. Taehyung rotates to his next work, some kind of sake holder, and Jin asks if someone got into a fight and that’s why these things are happening

111. Taehyung also has a white clay piece, which is very abstract and lumpy when he holds it up; even he can’t stop himself from smiling

     1. Yoongi asks if it’s “the boo and boo”, holding his hands close to his mouth until he reveals that he’s talking about the sound a conch shell makes when you blow in it; it’s adorable

     2. Hoseok begins making the same sound with him to validate his feelings

     3. Taehyung agrees that it can be that if he wants!

     4. Jin cannot calm down; the more Taehyung explains with his calm, unbothered persona the more he loses his shit

     5. Jimin is also mostly gone at this stage, no longer able to maintain composure

112. When Taehyung finishes all you can see are the top of Jinmin’s heads as they bend over in laughter

113. Namjoon mentions that it was so funny when they all fell off; this is enough to completely fell Jimin, who stands up and staggers to the back of the room in hysterics

114. The production staff reminds them to thank the teacher, which they do much more seriously, because BTS is the proverbial bull in this pottery shop and they know it

115. The teacher’s face has a sort of customer service rictus on it that indicates he’s happy they were here and will be happier when they are gone

116. They stand to do the outro and Namjoon suggests Bangtan yell Run and he yells BTS

117. Jimin, slightly horrified, realizes that it will be way easier on the teacher if he yells the Run part and changes it immediately

118. While BTS is gone, they show an epilogue of what the final products look like, and the thing about pottery is that it always looks shiny and cool after it’s been fired even if it’s sort of ridiculous shaped

119. This epilogue also reveals that the room they filmed in was very small, which makes me think this shop is not very big, which makes me hope this guy got some business out of his pain

120. The teacher is asked to choose the best ones, even though it’s not a competition, and he chooses Jimin’s white clay bow and Namjoon’s east/west bowl

121. Taehyung’s pieces truly are ridiculously misshapen, but they actually look kind of cool, and that is very much how things always go for him

122. In a move that reveals that they know exactly what sort of gold they have on their hands, they do a trailer for the next Run BTS series which will be… Blue Village, and the beginnings of many many many MANY memes in stan lore; we’re out!

The Finish Line:

I had forgotten about Taehyung’s pottery mishap when I started rewatching this, and Jin’s uncontrolled laughter really got me rolling again. He hasn’t found anything this funny since the time they were all cooking and Jungkook’s potatoes stuck to the plate, and if the laughter had a touch of mania, well, these were manic times for them.

Unlike coffee-making, I’m not sure pottery made it into life relevancy, particularly for Yoongi who was not very subtle about the fact that he really wanted to get out of there and (probably) work, but the episode itself was much more hilarious. Bangtan is usually funnier when they’re slightly failing at things, because they can’t resist a good team roast when it stumbles in front of them.

Next episodes, as they tease, are the Blue Village ones, and good god am I excited. I don’t remember everything about them, but I remember enough to know that there’s good reason they kept coming back to “roleplaying games where there is a hidden evil team they have to find” content in the future - they’re all passionate nerds. See you there!