Run BTS Rewatch Episode 26: When the Pawn Hits the Conflict

시크릿 에이전트, Secret Agent

Moving from video game competition to real life competition, this week we get to watch the Bangtan Boys run through a game parlor trying to be secret agents. More importantly they get to watch each other, and this fills them with so much delight that it’s infectious. Another great episode, coming up!

Setup:

They’ll be divided into three teams to do two tests to see which team would make the best secret agents. I will go out on a limb and say none of them would make good secret agents, and they make much better global superstars, but I’m sure they will do their best! They divide into teams using the time-honored tradition of picking pieces of paper out of a cup.

The Moments of Pure Love:

1. They’re all wearing black suits with white shirts and black ties and should look like a bunch of caterers but instead they look hot per usual

2. For this episode they’ve been mic’ed up with fluffy lapel mics and they find them fascinating and mold-like, so much so that Minjoon begin singing Serendipity

3. The producers try to get them interested in why they’re wearing suits but they’re more interested in doing the Rainism dance to each other

4. After they pick out of the cup, Namjoon for some reason has two and Hoseok none, so Namjoon asks him to pick one and he picks the one Jimin is holding

5. Team A is Yoongi and Taehyung, Team B is Jungkook and Namjoon, and Team C is Jin, Hoseok, and Jimin

6. They get to pick their own team names in this one, always a treat, and they go with:

   1. “Aaaaaaaaaay” for Taegi / Team A

   2. BTS for Namkook / Team B

   3. Jin wants to be Bangtan Seonyeondan for Team C, while Jimin wants to be white mold, so they do RPS, and when Jin wins he calls them Team Kim Seokjin

7. Jimin claims that no one has ever won with the name Team Kim Seokjin but it’s too late, the RPS has decided

8. Game 1 is some kind of gauntlet of four missions that they have to try to pass with high points, and the highest point team wins

9. Team Kim Seokjin goes first, and they enter the mission space crouched with fake guns drawn like complete nerds

10. Stage 1 is shooting laser guns at targets on the ceiling and 2seok are super into it, making their own sound effects and background music

11. Jimin is totally confused as to what they’re even shooting at, but once he gets it he really gets it

12. The problem with this is that while they’re playing as a team the scores are individual so they are incented to fuck each other over for the entire time because they each want to be the best within their team

13. This leads to a situation where they try to agree on a time to finish shooting but the truce is repeatedly broken leading to more shooting and yelling

14. Stage 2 is going into a pitch black room and scanning marks on a wall with a provided phone, but some marks deduct points

15. The problem with this is that because the room is pitch black Hoseok is totally freaked out and at maximum Gwangju; he mostly says “yah yah yah yah yah” over and over again as he moves a millimeter at a time

16. Jin also gets jump scared by a camera as he’s feeling around the walls, one that isn’t even being held by anyone, and they’re both lucky Jimin is there

17. Stage 3 is looking for pictures on the wall that match the ones they’ve been given

18. The problem with this is that 2seok are mostly scanning at random and hoping it works

19. Jimin, on the other hand, is a master of ferreting out secrets and finds the pictures hidden behind doors and inside of mirrors

20. They finally master teamwork in this room and help each other find what they need

21. Team Kim Seokjin try to move on to the next stage and Hoseok starts screaming at the top of his lungs for no apparent reason

22. In perhaps the first instance of perfection in Run BTS editing, they cut to the other four guys sitting calmly in their chairs in the lobby hearing Hoseok’s muffled screams; they all wonder what’s going on in there

23. The producer says that one person has a very low score, and all of them say, in unison, that it must be Hoseok

24. Stage 4 is going through a room of lasers without touching them, and Jimin is very confident in his ability

25. The problem with this is that if one person touches a laser they all have to go back to the beginning

26. Jimin goes first, without much issue, being careful and graceful

27. Hoseok comes second, again careful but also yelling instructions at Jimin in front of him and Jin behind him

28. Jin is last, and Hoseok and Jimin have made it through when Jin’s ID badge swings down and touches a laser, sending them all back

29. Next time Hoseok touches it and Jin yells at him so much that Hoseok is almost crying from laughter

30. Jimin, who has never and will never touch a laser in his entire lithe life, is so irritated at having to do this over and over again!

31. They eventually pass, with some more drama, and come out into the lobby acting all cool and like it was no big deal

32. Yoongi’s smile is one of total disbelief at their bullshit

33. Final scores for Team Kim Seokjin: Jin with 350, Jimin, with 330, and Hoseok with 290

    1. Jin is convinced he got a high score for the experience and demands to know if it is

    2. He is informed that he and Jimin have gotten Red Level based on their scores, while Hoseok is Blue Level

34. Namjoon finds an infographic and brings it into the shot to start explaining how the color levels work, like belt colors in Taekwondo, and even though he is basically lecturing them about something he is just learning about in this moment they’re all pretty into it

35. Jimin says that if they want to get Black Level (the master) they have to go in alone because they all started fighting each other as soon as they went in, which is true

36. Team Aaaaaaay walk in with Yoongi making secret spy mood music for them like a complete nerd

37. Team Kim Seokjin are doing dramatic re-enactments for Team BTS about how they had to squish up to scan their phones against the wall

38. Jimin, after returning to his seat, completely misses it and falls on the ground

39. Team Kim Seokjin gets to watch footage of Team Aaaaaay going, and Jungkook comes around the side and tries to take a look too; he’s caught out immediately and smiles very big as he tries a dumb lie to get out of it

40. Namkook decide to change their team name - Namjoon suggests Brain but Jungkook likes Bingsman, a play off of Kingsman

41. Team Aaaaaay is trying to do the shooting but while Taehyung has figured it out and has played a lot of shooters, Yoongi is mostly wandering around confused

42. In the next room, Taehyung again figures out the objective while Yoongi praises him

43. Taehyung scampers around the dark room looking for the right marks while Yoongi kneels in the center and waves his hands around at nothing

44. Team Kim Seokjin find them hilarious and want to keep the footage for their own amusement

45. Namjoon says that they’re way quieter than the last team, which: no kidding

46. Taehyung realizes that the camera in the room can be turned around and on to give them a little bit of light, and he happily cheats without batting an eye

47. Team Kim Seokjin is incensed at this brazen cheating and bring the footage to the producers to plead for a penalty; the producers agree to deduct points

48. Yoongi is starting to figure it out, but he looks very silly as he moths his way around the room, even touching the ceiling on his tiptoes

49. In the picture room, Team Aaaaay takes awhile to figure out all of the hiding places and how scanning things work, and this really sets them back

50. Team Kim Seokjin reminisce about the laser room and how Hoseok kept screwing up but still ordering them around

51. Namkook are enticed by all of the talk about what’s going on, and Jungkook starts bouncing in his chair in excitement for the challenge

52. Meanwhile Team Aaaaay are really struggling with the lasers, and Yoongi has to rabbit jump over the final lasers like a video game character

53. Jimin, smiling, says watching is way more fun than doing it

54. Team Kim Seokjin delivers their report which is 1) Taegi were bad and 2) they were cheaters

55. Final scores for Team Aaaaay: Taehyung: 300 (250 after the penalty), Yoongi 228

    1. For evenness sake they add the lowest score from the 3 person team to make sure everyone has 3 scores to add together, just FYI

56. Yoongi notes that even though he tried really hard his score is the lowest so far, and Jin admits that they wanted to lower his score for cheating too but they felt too guilty after seeing what it was

57. However, always ready for baseless confidence, Yoongi wants to try the intermediate level right away

58. Team Bingsman enter the arena and instantly get confused by the laser guns then start fighting each other

59. The rest of them watch from the lobby, and Hoseok says that Jungkook is very competitive with a knowing smile

60. Jimin is very excited to watch Namkook fight each other, even going up to listen at the door to hear them talk

61. Namjoon tells Jungkook that they need to go while still firing, which Jimin points out is exactly what Hoseok did to him

62. The dark room is also confounding to Namkook, but they’re both able to move around at least

63. Jungkook frantically directs Namjoon around, and gets an elbow in the face for his troubles

64. As they move onto the pictures, Namjoon fiercely instructs himself to calm down

65. Jimin notes that Namjoon’s chin is thrust out, which either means he’s concentrating on something or he wants to look cool

66. The producers imply that Namjoon has a really high score, but Hoseok is confident that Namjoon will be thwarted by the lasers

67. Jin adds that Jungkook will get angry because Namjoon will be thwarted, and Hoseok does a hilarious impression of Jungkook whining to Namjoon to just stay still

68. Team Bingsman arrives in the lasers, and the spectators are sooooooo excited for this show

69. Jungkook slides through in seconds but Namjoon, trying to copy him, simply cannot get his body to work

70. Jin, Hoseok, Jimin, ad Taehyung are outwardly cackling while Yoongi smiles his most unrestrained smile

71. Jungkook realizes that the only way they can pass is if Namjoon goes first and Jungkook tells him exactly how to move at all times, and it works

72. Final Bingsman scores: Namjoon 320, Jungkook 288

73. This makes Team Kim Seokjin the winners of Game 1, which they think is the only game, and they start celebrating obnoxiously

74. But the producers announce a second game, and Jimin gets so excited that his eyes sparkle over what it might be

75. Game 2 is cart driving, like with real carts on a real course, and is a relay to avoid them all running into each other and ruining Big Hit’s bottom line

76. Hoseok tries to convince them that the winner of the last game should get the best starting position but they’re all wise to that gambit and go with RPS

77. Track 1 is Bingsman, with Jungkook driving twice, Track 2 is Team Aaaaaay with Taehyung driving twice, and Track 3 is Team Kim Seokjin, with Jin starting off and Jimin anchoring

78. Team Kim Seokjin improvise a cheer reminiscent of Team Rocket’s entrances, and Jin is pleased

79. Taehyung is a great and fearless driver, taking a commanding lead, while Jin and Jungkook battle in the rear

80. They switch out, and midway through the first lap Namjoon says, to himself, “I’m scared”

81. Yoongi is driving coolly and maintaining his lead, and Jimin is all aflutter at his hotness

82. Hoseok, however, may be a risk-averse worrier but he’s also good at driving in real life and in video games, and he overtakes Yoongi in their final lap much to Yoongi’s disbelief

83. Taehyung now has a new purpose in life, which is to go head to head with his soulmate and nemesis to catch up

84. Jungkook is so far behind after Namjoon’s terrified showing, but he’s trying to have fun out there

85. Jimin is no slouch, and he takes first easily for Team Kim Seokjin, with Team Aaaay in second and Team Bingsman taking last

86. Team Aaaay ends up in last overall thanks to the 50 point penalty, and Yoongi says he has have never done anything wrong. which is correct

87. Namjoon says that this emphasizes good sportsmanship, as though he wasn’t shoving Jungkook out of the way to try to beat him at lasers earlier that day

88. Taegi hold hands to stay united in their shaming

89. Hoseok, well aware that he just won a competition, asks if there is a prize, and there is

90. Namjoon, just from the size of the box, is convinced that it’s an RC car, and this excites him so much that he jumps up and down like he’s on a pogo stick until they open it

91. They do, and it’s some brand that they all know and get incredibly excited about, and it’s really hard to explain sufficiently how nerdy these guys are, truly

92. Because there’s only one car, Jimin proposes that the three members of Team Kim Seokjin race each other to see who gets it

93. Jimin takes a big lead as Jin complains loudly that his cart is slower than the other two

94. Hoseok sneaks up to challenge and then pass, but the two of them run into each other and Hoseok spins off the course with a look in his eye that speaks ill for the Jihope room later that evening

95. Jimin ends up winning and getting the car, and he delivers a winning speech that emphasizes that everyone should drive more safely than they just did

96. Namjoon, visions of lawsuits dancing behind his eyes, suggest that they end the episode by shouting “Safe! Driving!” together

The Finish Line:

I can’t say enough about how much none of these guys can be a secret agent. Jungkook might be the closest, physically, and Jin the closest, skill-wise, but the competitiveness and the loudness respectively are always going to get in their way. They are very fortunate to be talented musicians instead, who could now buy their own RC cars but are still more excited to win them in a competition against each other.

Team Kim Seokjin is a longstanding tradition of Run BTS and I was glad to see them win as befits such a noble name. I also think they should do more Run episodes where they get to watch each other as they frantically try to do something, because nothing is funnier to them than when the others are failing at something, which is in turn the funniest thing in the world to me!

And, of course, the Run BTS editors are starting to flex themselves, becoming as much a part of the entertainment package as the boys themselves, and that’s going to pay off in spades in future episodes. See you there!