Run BTS Rewatch Episode 13: We Have Arrived

다시 돌아온 스파이 1, Once Again The Spy Returns Pt 1

Finally out of the skit era! No more skits! Now we battle to the death!

Well maybe not, but they always make it feel like it. This is a group of competitive people (though with varying intensities) and they’re newly unleashed to form petty and temporary alliances as they all fight to make everyone else lose. Plus they get wet this time!

Note: On the official playlist this does not have English subs on it, so if you’re watching along you can either look for a different video with subs or do what I did and auto-translate it. I translated the Spanish subtitles to English, assuming the translator would have an easier time with it, but sorry for any nuance or incorrect wording that results!

Setup:

In an indoor water park, two teams will complete challenges to try to win food, the most sacred of Run BTS prizes. The winning team in each challenges draws two random food items out of a cup while the losing team draws one, which is oddly generous for the production team. However, the twist is that there is a spy who is trying to make them lose, and they need to ferret him out at the same time. Yoongi is the designated MC and doesn’t have to do the challenges, making the teams even on each side.

The Moments of Pure Love:

1. Throughout the episode the boys are wearing these ridiculous water shoes of varying neon colors and they crack me up every time I see them

2. They are so excited to be in Namjoon’s hometown of Ilsan that they can’t stop mentioning it

3. The water facility is called One Mount, which is a Korean to English pun on Ilsan that’s at a level even I can understand, which I appreciate!

4. They start fake running in the water in their dorky shoes and you can already tell this is going to be a bonkers episode from their energy levels

5. The teams are divided into maknae line (Jimin, Taehyung, and Jungkook) and hyung line (Jin, Namjoon, Hoseok) and the hyungs are extremely pessimistic about their chances of winning

6. To learn if they are the spy or not, each member, including MC Yoongi, steps up and listens to some headphones where presumably some producers is telling them what they are; it functions as a combination high-tech Sorting Hat and poker face tester

7. They study each face closely as they take their turn, and everyone starts overreacting and being weird in compensation for their total lack of ability to lie

8. Everyone also starts doing weird shit on the outskirts of the group and spy accusations come flying in fast and furious before a single game has started

9. Game one is revealed to be two floating cylindrical tubes that each person has to get through in a relay while the opposite team rotates them; hopefully no one throws up

10. Yoongi messes up reading the game briefing; hyung team accuses him of being THE SPY

11. They do a staring contest to decide who goes first and Hoseok is so intense that Jungkook can’t help but laugh

12. The maknae team sails through the tubes quickly, Jimin doing somersaults when he gets tossed around, but the hyungs are very kind to them with the twirling

13. Jimin does a model pose with his wet hair and looks so hot it’s horrifying

14. The hyung team is much less graceful and much more hoot-y in their own efforts, mostly because the maknaes flip them around without remorse

15. Hoseok in particular is basically a screaming, twirling mess; Yoongi accuses him of being THE SPY, along with everyone else

16. Namjoon likens Hoseok’s performance to Samara crawling out of the television in the ring

17. The hyungs are 35 seconds slower than the maknaes but they’re just relieved it wasn’t worse

18. Hoseok draws water as their one dinner item; everyone accuses him of being THE SPY

19. Maknaes get kimbap and chips so they’re happy and stress-free

20. Game two is a floating platform upon which one member of each team will stand and try to push the other off using only the power of their firm ass and flexible hips. I swear to god this is real

21. Yoongi declares the maknaes get an advantage for winning the first game, namely that they get to choose their opponent; the hyungs are immediately scared

22. Jungkook goes first, and to absolutely no one’s surprise he picks Namjoon

23. They do a staring contest for no reason and Jungkook is flustered by Namjoon’s sexy eyebrow waggle

24. 2seok and Vmin do dancing cheers in the water for their respective teams; Jin’s cheer is so weird that Hoseok accuses him of being THE SPY

25. Jungkook and Namjoon slap asses a couple of times until Namjoon falls off

26. Jungkook summons Hoseok next, who tries to breakdance on the platform and almost falls off; Namjoon, Jin, and Jimin all accuse him of being THE SPY

27. Once Hoseok gets brave enough to actually thrust his ass at Jungkook, he ends up winning, surprising no one more than himself

28. Hoseok calls out Jimin, and they have the most sensual pre-battle ass evaluation yet before Jimin relentlessly hammers Hoseok off the platform

29. Jimin goes against Jin, who Yoongi says, unprompted, is very strong!

30. Jin tries to jump up and down, then ass-rush Jimin, but Jimin is too graceful and Jin ends up flying off

31. Maknae line picks burgers and fries and are very pleased with themselves

32. Namjoon chooses pickled radish and basically wants to die

33. Another fierce SPY discussion happens

    1. Hoseok warns the maknae line that they’re not suspicious enough of their own house

    2. Taehyung still thinks it’s Hoseok or Jin

    3. Yoongi announces that the spy isn’t allowed to eat

    4. Jungkook protests that that’s not fair, and then Namjin are after him!

    5. Namjoon accuses Jungkook of trying to lose when they did their ass fight

    6. Jungkook sort of stares around blankly and they leave him alone

34. During this entire section there are two production guys hanging out in the pool behind them waiting for them to end this ridiculous argument so they can move the platform away and get on to the next shoot; the looks on their faces say this happens to them a LOT

35. Game 3 is even more floating platforms that they have to traverse as fast as possible, which they’re sure to be great at

36. They make them hold a go pro while they do it which is hilarious

37. Taehyung sails through with just a couple of mistakes, though they accuse him of being THE SPY just for fun

38. Jimin falls off before he even starts, then falls off about a dozen times on a single small one while the editors put circus music behind him, and they all think he is THE SPY

39. Jungkook also falls off a ton of times and the rest of them are pleased he’s bad at something

40. Jin brute forces his way through with almost no errors, and everyone is shocked

    1. At this point I need to note that Jin and Namjoon are wearing towels on their heads folded up to look like Princess Leia hair buns and it’s fantastic

41. Hoseok is the first one to make it almost all the way through without falling off, and mocks the maknaes

42. Jungkook has at some point swum out to the middle of the pool and cheers for Bangtan with a huge smile on his face

43. Namjoon also flies through, smugly, and the hyungs are excited to do well at something

44. Yoongi is press-ganged into trying it out by Vmin, even though Yoongi really doesn’t want to get wet

45. He doesn’t get wet above his knees at all, and they’re all really impressed

46. The hyungs crushed the maknaes, with Jin clocking in at the fastest 8 seconds and Jimin the longest with a minute and one second

    1. Yoongi tries to trick them by saying he was the fastest, when they ask, but they don’t believe him even a little bit and silently wait for him to reveal the real answer, which cracked me up

47. Namjoon draws donkatsu (pork) and something that the translator didn’t pick up but might have been some other kind of pork; he says this means he’s not THE SPY

48. Jimn draws pretzels and feels shame, but Yoongi assures him that it’s still better than water and pickled radish

49. Part 1 ends on this note, with the promise of Game 4 to come!

The Finish Line:

I really like this episode, and not just in contrast to the past two slightly painful ones, but because it really exemplifies BTS’s eternal paranoia. Put even a painfully low-stakes traitor in their midst and it’s Lord of the Flies in half a second! No gesture, no word, no facial expression goes unpunished as they all accuse each other of constant perfidy. The only two people not accused of being the spy at some point in this episode were Namjoon and Taehyung, so I’m sure their turn is coming.

Also on display in this episode was the first instance of a member being granted power and immediately making that everyone else’s problem. Yoongi made up rules whenever he felt like it and the production staff never stopped him, which is exactly the kind of petty tyranny Run BTS was made for. Great work Yoongi!

So who is the spy? Will anyone get to eat any food at the end of this? Tune in next recaps to find out, or just watch the next two episodes if you’re really desperate, I fully understand, because I did the exact same thing…